Original: “Less is more.” – Ludwig Mies van der Rohe
Improved: “Less is more, more or less.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “Time heals all wounds.” – Traditional
Improved: “Time wounds all heels.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “That men do not learn very much from the lessons of history is the most important of all the lessons of history.” – Aldous Huxley
Improved: “That men do not learn very much from the lessons of the History Channel is the most important of all the lessons of history.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “A rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.” – Gertrude Stein
Improved: “A rose is a rose is a rose is a rose is a rose is a rose is a rose.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “Never send to know for whom the bell tolls. It tolls for thee.” – John Donne
Improved: “Never send to know for whom the bell tolls. It’s probably tolling for Jerry. He has emphysema.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “I am not a crook.” – Richard M. Nixon
Improved: “I am not a crook. But I’m not so sure about you.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “An eye for an eye and a tooth for a tooth.” – Matthew 5:38
Improved: “An eye for a tooth and a tooth for an eye and everyone’s happy.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “Give me liberty or give me death!” – Patrick Henry
Improved: “Give me liberty and, while we’re at it, give me some money, too!”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel, but a comedy to those who think.” – Horace Walpole
Improved: “Life is a tragedy for those who feel, but a comedy to the Superrich.”
New and Improved Quotation for Today
Original: “Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts absolutely.” – Lord Acton
Improved: “Power tends to corrupt, and absolute power corrupts, absolutely.”
